So you’ve matched with someone spectacular on Tinder (or Bumble), or maybe just anyone at all, and now you’re racking your brain trying to come up with a conversation starter befitting of this momentous occasion.Or maybe you’ve seen poor response rates in the past, and you’re looking to improve your openers. So let me tell you: Doesn’t exist, because tastes, preferences and opinions of the people you’ve swiped on are as varied as those faces flying left and right. When adhering strictly to this MO, you also run the danger of starting an interview instead of a conversation. Another disadvantage, apart from not exactly sticking out from the crowd is how time intensive it can be to find something to reference.But I do feel it’s worth a shot in seemingly lost causes, and remember: It’s just a foot in the door. The rest of the resulting conversation, date, or even relationship, will be as real as if you had spent an hour coming up with a “real” message that may not even have lead to a response because it felt tortured and desperate. I have my own take, but I’d be remiss not to mention why I don’t recommend following the most prevalent tips and trends, before we get to my personal advice. People love talking about themselves, and referencing something they wrote about themselves is sure to get their attention and show them that they have yours. Or give up (preventively) and move on without messaging?This has to be the single most parroted piece of texting advice out there. I suggest a different approach (see linked post, and/or read on). Certainly not bad advice and useful to remember in all walks of life.Remembering where your strengths lie, and not jumping on every fad just because others are seeing great success with a particularly clever opening seems prudent, however. Puns – especially puns on their name – may yield you some measure of success in terms of sweet sweet Reddit karma, if posted to /r/tinder, but if your goal extends beyond that hopefully hilarious screenshot, you may want to reconsider.I also feel strongly that you should indeed always be yourself, so that if they fall for you, they won’t be in love with your alter ego instead of you. Even if it works out well for some people, you shouldn’t take those highly upvoted posts as evidence of anything other than that they were the most popular (maybe successful) among thousands of submissions.
Being natural and sincere, and not trying to force anything that wasn’t meant to be, even if I was having a dry patch and writing to my first match in a week. For such situations where the alternatives are silence, or a forced attempt at making a connection, or being something you’re not. The only way such a simple opener will work as well for you as it worked for me is if the wording/style fits your character." The dating app Hinge (it's like Tinder but based more on your Facebook friend group) did some experimenting to find out what kinds of opening messages work best once you've been matched with someone. Normally, on Hinge you're free to use whatever opening line you want — it shows you mutual friends and interests then gives you a blank canvas to write whatever you want. (this one improved your response likelihood by 31%)2. All of these worked better than the standard "hey" or "hey, what's up" that is the baseline greeting most people use. Would you rather have weekly hiccups or never sneeze to completion ever again? What's the most awkward movie you've watched with your parents?